Thoughts On The Weekend

by tessa8m on December 5, 2011

in Race Recap,Weekend Recap

Ahoy There!

(I know I have mentioned this before, but seriously, why do I find it so difficult and awkward to open up a post? I am often so torn on a simple “hello” message…) Phew mini tangent there, moving on…

I am now officially into my final week of classes, and of course, that much closer to winter break, aka several weeks of blissful nothingness :) However, an all too diligent thought has been in the back of my mind for quite some time now, but it is now sufficiently becoming a regular presence. It’s the thought that, holy crap, I am soon going to be entering my final semester at college… oh my. If this is not the ultimate reality check right now, than I am not too sure what is. Although I could talk about my crazy anxiety reflections on college and graduating for a few posts, that is for a later time.

Today is about the weekend, so let’s get to it!

I will admit now that although I usually make an effort these days to go out at least one night during the weekend to “step out of my comfort one,” well I was just not feeling it these past few days. There must be something in the air, or the fact that we are in the awkward and stressful few weeks before returning home for students, but there is definitely a vibe of blah-ness going around right now (yes, that is in fact a word).

My less-than-stellar attitude managed to take over any effort I might have felt like making to go out… Damn. As I am sure many of you can relate to, I am at the point where I am solely focusing on getting through my last few papers, exams and finals, and my mind is quite set on returning home.

Allow me to start on Friday, so I can get my head around where I am going with all of this.

For some time now, a reader of my blog from a nearby school have been exchanging emails about various topics, but mainly on subjects related to our disordered eating. We both found that we could relate to what each other were saying quite often, and continued to recognize this through the emails. So after a few weeks of conversation, we decided to meet up over coffee on Friday! We had a lovely time together while each pouring our hearts out about our experiences with an eating disorder.

I say this quite often as many of you do as well, but I am forever thankful for this community for many reasons.

Most importantly though is the fact that I have found I am not alone in this fight... far from it as a matter of fact. I struggle with this whole process on a daily basis, but knowing that their are so many others out there that are both rooting and battling with me, encourages me to keep pressing on.

This is why meeting this reader was such a welcome experience. Not only is it nice to connect emails and letters to an actual person, but I have also made a new friend. Additionally, I am comfortable talking openly about what goes through my head here on this blog, but actually speaking about it out loud is a whole different story. It felt great to just sit there and talk to someone, right out in public and just vent about it all, while also hearing what she had to say.

We plan to meet up again next weekend to take on a rather terrifying (for me) food fear challenge… yep I still have those. So stay tuned for that! I will give you a hint though it involves THIS:

The next day, it was time to make the decision whether or not to run in the Hot Chocolate 5k on Sunday. If you read my post yesterday you now know that I did (recap below) but actually making the final choice to was quite a difficult one. I feel like a major hypocrite for running in the race, as I had proclaimed literally just under a week ago that I was taking time off of running. It’s just, I couldn’t NOT run in this… it’s one of my favorite races of the season!

Once I finally made the decision to participate in the run, this automatically meant turning Saturday into a time of rest. Honestly, I found this particular rest day to be much more difficult to mentally tolerate than usual. For the first few hours of the morning, I contemplated going to the gym… oh I will only do 20-30 minutes of cardio; I should go and just do arms and core, that wouldn’t be too bad for me; maybe I could even job a bit today!

No. A rest day for me is complete sitting-on-your-butt rest… none of the “active recovery” stuff for this girl. I believe why I was distressed about not really moving my body for several hours, is because not only was Saturday an unusual day for me to take off, but I also have not been running at all the past few days, aka not working out hard enough, not burning enough calories, aka losing my fitness, aka gaining weight, aka getting fat, aka doom and gloom. Yeah, I think you get it.

I will have you know that as much as I truly wanted to, I did not give in to those silly, BS voices. I actually told myself that if I did go to the gym, than I would not be allowed to run in the Hot Chocolate 5k… one or the other. I chose the latter of course.

The race did not start until 10:00 am on Sunday, so a crazy-early wake up call was not necessary. I arrived around 8:45 to make sure I snagged a parking spot (parking in Northampton is a betch and a half), picked up my bib number and read and relaxed for the next hour. Oh and took pictures of myself to pass the time… ;) There is no rhyme or reason to these.

Not sure what that awkward left arm is all about...

I eventually made my way into a building that was near the start and guess what rather wonderful person I ran into…

Weeee… Kiah from Good For Me Girl! This was not completely random though, as we had discussed meeting up before or after the race. I have met this lovely lady before, and it was great to see her again :) Check out her blog for her own recap when she writes it, not my story to tell!

I made my way to the starting line just five minutes before 10 because I was just too dang cold to chill out (no pun intended) in the freezing morning.

Aright, so get ready for some more hypocrite action from this girl. Yeah so remember that time I told you I was just going to jog the race, and enjoy the environment? Crap, I didn’t do that. Once I was in the starting chute and saw my usual pace group a few yards ahead of me, I felt quite compelled to begin at that area, and so I did. I joined the 7:10 pace area and waited for the start (with Kiah!).

I made another promise to myself that if I felt any pain in my leg at all I would slow down and jog the rest. Also if fatigue settled in, well there is no way to push through the kind of tiredness I have been feeling lately, so that would have automatically turned the race into a near walk.

At precisely 10 the race began! Now I am not much into recapping each mile, but I will tell you that I felt very strong for the first 2.5 miles and then started to drag toward the end. In fact my first mile split was 6:50, too fast for how I have been feeling lately. I ended up finishing the 5k in 21:38.

This is not close to my PR, but a respectable time (for me) nonetheless. What this race did show me was that, although my body is getting better and the iron supplements to seem to be working, I still have a long way to go, hence the fatigue that was getting to me after just 18 or so minutes of racing.

I did get me some free hot chocolate at the end though! Well not free as I paid for the entry fee… but you catch my drift.

Fun(?) fact: this was my first year at this race that I actually drank the hot chocolate. For the past two times I have raced, I happily accepted my mug and then took pride in the fact that I didn’t drink any of the creamy hot chocolate after, while every other racer “gave in” to it….ugh those freakin thoughts. I mean, I am pretty embarrassed to even reveal that. I “loved” the thin feeling after a race so much that I could not imagine ruining it by drinking a calorie-laden beverage.

So glad I am passed that (for the most part, I only “allowed” myself to drink half), as this hot chocolate was particularly tasty.

I suppose I am slightly annoyed with myself for running, as I went against what I had promised just a few days ago. But I ran it and it was for the right reasons and for the sincere fact that I love a road race and every aspect that is involved.

So not going to lie, I had I guess a…incident… later on Sunday that threw me for a bit of a loop. However, this post has gone on quite long enough at this point. Plus it is currently 9:30 pm (I write my posts the night before and then publish in the morning) so it is time for bed. Try not to be jealous of the ever-rockin lifestyle I lead ;)

-Have you ever met another blogger “in real life?” If not, get on that, it’s rather fantastic :) Can’t wait to meet more in person! Kaitlyn, Lindsay and Alexandra, I am looking at you!

-Are you feeling the general poop mood going around right now? I hope not, and that it’s just me!

-What was the last difficult decision you made? Did everything turn out okay? In the debate of whether or not to do the race, everything worked out, but feelings of guilt for various reasons were there.

-Did you run any races this weekend? If not, what was your workout? Walking, hiking, gym, strength training, sitting on your bum? <– totes mc goats counts, it was my Saturday after all :)

-How was your weekend? Anything particularly interesting to note? Please share anything about it!

See you tomorrow or Thursday (Wednesday= WIAW) for some body image chit chat!

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{ 101 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Khushboo December 5, 2011 at 5:53 am

Congrats on a superb race time and for actually accepting the hot chocolate! Drinking it alone is sign of just how much you have progressed! Don’t beat yourself over running even though you had said earlier you weren’t going to–> sometimes the urge comes and at the end of the day, you ran just over 3 miles and stopped…you didn’t go run another 5 or whatever afterwards to reach a certain mileage/burn more calories!

My weekend was fun particularly Sunday–> spa day followed by my friend’s brother’s wedding reception at night!

Have a fab Monday!
Khushboo recently posted..December Do’s & Don’ts

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2 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 3:46 pm

Ha it’s interesting that you mentioned that about the feeling of “needing” to run a few extra miles… more on that later this week :)
I am so jealous of your spa day!

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3 Joy December 5, 2011 at 6:00 am

-Are you feeling the general poop mood going around right now? I totally am

-What was the last difficult decision you made? Did everything turn out okay? My last difficult decision was talking to my doc and agreeing that I’d consider residential (again)

-Did you run any races this weekend? I wish! Friday I was sick and Saturday I cleaned and took the dogs for a walk because body image beasts don’t care how you feel and yesterday was all about Christmas (got a tree, wrapped gifts, did cards, etc)

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4 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 3:47 pm

I am glad you were productive even though you felt sick! Thank you for stopping by Joy :)

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5 Zuzana December 5, 2011 at 6:01 am

Congrats on finishing the race, I would have done the same thing. We’ll be dead before we know it, so sometimes doing what you truly desire is the only way to go. Same goes for the hot chocolate.
My last difficult decision was to choose a relationship over career. It was time to put someone else first for a change.
My weekend involved Christmas tree shopping, dancing all night and working out with the person I chose over a corner office. So worth it.
Have a wonderful week, Tessa, and good luck with your papers and finals!!
Zuzana recently posted..The new and improved Zii

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6 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 3:48 pm

Haha oh goodness what a downer remark… we will be dead before we know it… but it is true!
I am glad you had a good weekend overall :)

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7 Zuzana December 6, 2011 at 2:45 am

Haha, you’re right, that’s what happens when I comment on Monday morning! :)
Zuzana recently posted..Recovery Week 1 – The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

8 Emma December 5, 2011 at 6:19 am

Sometimes when the weekend comes, all I want to do it stay in and do nothing, since I am so busy during the week. I felt kind of blah and meh like you did for the last few weeks, but this last week has gotten better. I think people just cycle through good moods and bad moods sometimes.

I have never met another blogger in real life, but I would love to! I think it would be so cool.
Emma recently posted..A Day of Few Words

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9 Tara December 5, 2011 at 6:37 am

As disappointed as you are that you ran and didn’t really listen to your body in that respect, you made a lot of other huge strides that are worth being proud of!! The fact that the day before, you were able to take a rest day despite all the thoughts you had of going is huge. They’re hard to battle! Then after the race with the hot chocolate. I don’t even know if I would have been able to do that, but I bet it was so worth it! Congrats my friend :)
Tara recently posted..Mish Mosh

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10 Alexandra December 5, 2011 at 6:49 am

Your race time sounds rockin to me! And HOLLAAAA for drinking the hot chocolate!!! :D I don’t think you should call yourself a hypocrite for running it– I agree with Tara, you took a rest day beforehand and that’s always SO difficult. Way to go! :)
Oh and you can bet whenever I make my way up north, you and I are having an EPIC meetup!
Ps– my arms always fo awkward things in pictures too and I feel so awkward opening posts…I’m always like what should I say?! Haha
Alexandra recently posted..Mum’s the Word–Pandemonium in Pistachio Butter Land

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11 Anna @ Food Fitness Frolicking December 5, 2011 at 7:17 am

Tessa, I’m proud of you for running the 5k! I know you didn’t plan on it, per se, but I’m happy that you did it because you truly wanted to! I think it would’ve been worse if you would’ve ‘sat on the sidelines’ simply because you told yourself you couldn’t.

I can’t believe we’re both so close to finishing this semester..crazy, right? I think we’re in the same boat though..I’m just in ‘go-mode’ right now and all I want to do is finish exams and head home!
Anna @ Food Fitness Frolicking recently posted..Happy 6 Month Birthday, Blog!

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12 Laura @ LauraLikesDesign December 5, 2011 at 7:22 am

Dang, you are fast! My 5k is more around 23 minutes.

It was a weekend filled with lattes, Christmas movies, and friends!

PS my blog moved: Lauralikesdesign.com/blog
Laura @ LauraLikesDesign recently posted..Happy to Return + New Puppy

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13 Dana December 5, 2011 at 8:44 am

That hot chocolate looks so good and it looks like it was freezing! I don’t think I would have been able to pass that up ever.

I am also about to enter my last semester in college and ahh it’s a scary feeling, but I’ve definitely got that blah feeling too. Even when I try to do something fun I keep thinking about how much work I have to do. But we’re almost there!

You should be proud that you did take that rest day on Saturday and drank that hot chocolate. Every little bit of progress counts!
Dana recently posted..Peppermint Sticks & Sunflower Seeds

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14 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 8:00 pm

Thank you for reminding me of the progress Dana! You are right, every bit counts :)

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15 Lauren @ What Lauren Likes December 5, 2011 at 8:48 am

Congrats on the race time! WootWoot :)
Lauren @ What Lauren Likes recently posted..A Sweet for Saturday

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16 Fran@ Broken Cookies Don't Count December 5, 2011 at 9:06 am

I recently met some other bloggers. A writer’s group that I belong to had a blogger’s meet up. It was great fun. They’re doing it on a monthly basis, but unfortunately I’ll be away for the December and January meetups. I’m looking forward to February’s! I learned a lot of technical info about doing things on my blog. It was great! Have a good week, Tessa…You are doing great!
Fran@ Broken Cookies Don’t Count recently posted..Deck The Halls

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17 Allie December 5, 2011 at 9:21 am

Ah, I always feel awkward opening a post too! I am like hi? No that sounds weird… hello! Too perky. Hahah

How awesome that you met up with a blogging friend, I have always wanted to do that!
Allie recently posted..Behind the scenes

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18 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:48 pm

Ha yeah, I am glad you understand my awkward feeling!

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19 Dorsa @ Running Thoughts December 5, 2011 at 10:11 am

Baby steps, Tessa, baby steps :) Make sure to celebrate the little victories and before you know it you will be celebrating big ones.

I have never met a blogger friend in real life.. I want to, but I am not really sure how many bloggers are from Northern Virginia :)
Dorsa @ Running Thoughts recently posted..Knitting with my twin

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20 Kiah December 5, 2011 at 10:48 am

Who is that gorgeous chica on your arm?! Oh wait…glad I decided to run sans bangs…I never know how to keep those babies outa my way :-)
Anywho, I just have to say: even thought the race wasn’t a perfect experience, you are so so good at analyzing the situations you’re in. It’s very impressive. I’m just proud that I *started* in the same time section as you :-)
Kiah recently posted..Hot Chocolate 5k, race recap

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21 Erica @ For the Sake of Cake December 5, 2011 at 11:04 am

I enjoy the “Ahoy There” opening… I’d stick with that! ;-)

I met a few fellow bloggers at the beginning of November & it was really fun! It’s so awesome to be able to meet “strangers” & pick up as if you’ve known each other forever.
Erica @ For the Sake of Cake recently posted..December Goals

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22 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:29 pm

Heheh arrr I am a pirate! Blogger meet ups are the best!

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23 Errign December 5, 2011 at 11:24 am

I had my first “more than one blogger” meetup this weekend when I went for a 4-miler with Lee (inmytummy) and Ashley (Healthy Ashley).

I’m in a blah mood too – stress from moving and life is kicking me when I’m down hahah! I’m off to get sushi with a friend though, so that should cheer me up :)
Errign recently posted..6 Months Later

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24 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:24 pm

Ahh how fun you were able to run with them!
I hope you enjoyed your sushi date :)

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25 Sarah December 5, 2011 at 11:40 am

So proud of you for actually drinking the hot chocolate. Way to go girl!
Sarah recently posted..Work it out

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26 Lisa ♥ Healthful Sense December 5, 2011 at 11:41 am

Ahhh Tessa you are not alone for sure!!
I have not met another blogger but I would LOVE to =)
I think we bloggers have alot in common!!
Have a wonderful Monday =)

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27 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:23 pm

It really is a great thing to do… meeting them in real life is just so…fantastic :)

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28 Casey @ Pocket Full of Sunshine December 5, 2011 at 11:42 am

What a fantastic time—congratulations!! And I haven’t met any other bloggers either. :)
Casey @ Pocket Full of Sunshine recently posted..Christmas Cheer

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29 lindsay December 5, 2011 at 12:00 pm

so glad you got some good face time with a fellow blogger. I have made wonderful friends that way. Such support too!
This weekend was all about learning, learning to listen to your Heart and NOT that voice. I love it Tessa! Very encouraging!
lindsay recently posted..Breaking in the Kiwi Kitchen

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30 Alicia from Poise in Parma December 5, 2011 at 12:15 pm

I’m the queen of blogger meetups! We’re holding our 12th meetup of the Ohio Blogging Association this evening – we’re having a holiday party with a cookie swap. There’s a prize for best ugly holiday sweater.

p.s. I still freak out a pizza. Being gluten free, it doesn’t help get rid of the fear since finding GF pizza is a needle in a haystack.
Alicia from Poise in Parma recently posted..PIP’s Six Month Challenge–One Month At A Time

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31 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:22 pm

oh wow that sounds like a fantastic time! Yes, gluten free pizza is hard to come by! I have only seen a shop once

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32 Allie December 5, 2011 at 12:16 pm

If it felt good and you had fun–then heck, absolutely nothing wrong with running a race you’d planned on passing. And I’ve never met a blogger friend, but it’s up there on my to do list!
Allie recently posted..Slow It Down: The Ol’ College Try

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33 Nikki December 5, 2011 at 12:16 pm

Gahhh your hot chocolate run sounds a lot more successful than mine turned out to be! I am glad you got to enjoy the hot chocolate, and I am kind of jealous that they give out mugs as gifts! Also, I am jealous of your bloggy meetup! I have yet to meet a fellow blogger in real life :(
Nikki recently posted..Hot Chocolate 15k Race Recap

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34 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:21 pm

I can’t believe all that happened at that race! Crazy stuff right there… if I ever make my way down to your parts, you had better believe we are meeting up!!

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35 Sally Anne @ PaleoRunnerGirl December 5, 2011 at 12:40 pm

A hot chocolate race–HOW FUN!!! I am so glad you actually enjoyed some of your well-deserved cocoa!

I actually have never met a blogger in real life–I totally want to, though!

Congrats on the race–you are FAST, girlie!
Sally Anne @ PaleoRunnerGirl recently posted..Scenes From a Weekend

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36 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:20 pm

Thanks lady!

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37 Lindsay @ In Sweetness and In Health December 5, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Yes we need to meet up! It sounds as if this year (wow can’t believe the year is almost over!) may not work…but as soon as I get back to Boston we need to plan something!!! And I checked out those Game of Thrones books…totally think I’m gonna have to start reading them! They sound great :D.
Lindsay @ In Sweetness and In Health recently posted..Holiday Comforts

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38 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:20 pm

So you leave the 17th right? Or was it the 16th? But yes, if it does not work, totes next year of course!

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39 Ashley @ AlmostVegGirlie December 5, 2011 at 1:16 pm

I definitely don’t think you should be disappointed in yourself for running–I feel like you did it because YOU truly wanted to run, not because th voice inside your head said you had to. And I think taking a true rest day beforehand probably helped you decide to give running a try.

My weekend was pretty blah, but since my first final is later this week, I’ve had a lot of studying to do. I can’t wait to be done!
Ashley @ AlmostVegGirlie recently posted..Saturday Seven: Sick of School

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40 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:18 pm

Oh Ashley I so feel ya, we are quite close though, just a few more days!

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41 Josie @ happycorredora December 5, 2011 at 1:28 pm

Good job on the run and taking the hot chocolate! That’s a great step. Plus like a lot of exposure type activities, once you do them you realise they are not as scary as you had imagined them to be.

I was in a blah mood all last week… I am resolving to have a great week this week though. Cold be gone!

I haven’t met any bloggers because I am a total newbie (blogging less than 1 month) but I would absolutely love to later on :)
Josie @ happycorredora recently posted..Shaking off a slump (and a cold to boot!)

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42 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:13 pm

That is such a good idea to go into this week with a new attitude, that can make all the difference!

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43 Kaitlyn@TheTieDyeFiles December 5, 2011 at 2:33 pm

I’m glad you got to run the race, even if some of your disordered tendencies came out. And how fantastic that you got to meet up with a reader! I know what you mean about getting things out vocally. Until I talked about it with my boyfriend, I had ever talked to anyone about my disordered eating and I tried my best to hide it. It felt so good to get it out, no matter how many blog posts and articles I’d read on the topic. And yes, we need to meet! Perhaps a Boston get-together while you’re home on break? Lunch?
Kaitlyn@TheTieDyeFiles recently posted..Lessons from the Week

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44 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:17 pm

Ahh yes lunch would be fabulous! Followed up by froyo too I hope :)

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45 Kim @ Eat, Live, and Blog December 5, 2011 at 3:20 pm

Congrats on your race! It’s awesome that you get to have hot chocolate afterwards! That’s the race that I would love to run.

I never met a blogger in real life, but I would love to one day! I bet it would be fantastic to see them in person. :D
Kim @ Eat, Live, and Blog recently posted..Study Break

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46 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 7:17 pm

Yes the hot chocolate got me going faster to the finish!

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47 Alaina December 5, 2011 at 3:21 pm

I have a hard time turning down races too when I know they are going to be so much fun. A hot chocolate race sounds like a blast! Great job on the time!

This weekend I worked and ran. I’m on a training plan for my next half marathon in February. That’ll get my butt out into the cold! :-)

The last time I had to make a difficult decision was in October when I was debating not running the Cape Cod half marathon. The day before though, I threw my back out and that was that.
Alaina recently posted..Half at the Hamptons Training–Week 1

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48 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 9:37 pm

Oh gosh I remember reading about that :( And what half marathon is it?!

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49 Amy Lauren December 5, 2011 at 3:23 pm

Congratulations on your race and drinking hot chocolate (btw, I’ve had two cups already today, guess your race post made me want some, haha).

Don’t beat yourself up over the race or call yourself a hypocrite- things aren’t always black and white, and nobody makes a complete 180 change. I don’t think I could ever hold back during a race either, and at least you didn’t work out super hard the day before- which probably helped you run faster the day of the race.

I’ve never actually met any bloggers in real life- well, at least not anyone who I first “met” through the internet, obviously I know others who blog. It would be neat to one day, though.
Amy Lauren recently posted..Five Question Friday: Christmas Decoration Edition!

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50 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 6:59 pm

I appreciate you saying that Amy! You are right, I should not be so hard on myself by using the term hypocrite!

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51 Christine December 5, 2011 at 4:20 pm

Hey girl:)! Ive haven’t done that race yet but would like to some time. I was the same way with my last race last month. I had taken some time off running and said i wouldnt race it hard and just go by how i felt. Well that did not happen. I ran harder than i should and i definitely felt tired during the race. Plus I always feel like I should run fast at every race I do. Not much excitement for my weekend except for buying new running shoes whch I hope don’t give me any problems. I used to not eat any of the post race food (bcuz i thought it was too fattening plus im gluten free) so i never ate afterwards but now I bring my own healthy postrace snack:)

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52 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 6:54 pm

That is exactly how I feel Christine…every race I give 100% even when I should not! These are times I should just not sign up for races, as I know I can’t back down
Bringing your own healthy snacks for after is a great idea though, I do it as well :)

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53 Amy B @ Second City Randomness December 5, 2011 at 4:39 pm

You guys get mugs at the Hot Chocolate 5k??? I’m jealous! We get the hot chocolate… but in foam cups. How NOT green of them… :p

Great race, though! It’s a fun idea. Even if my stomach doesn’t always do well with the heavy amount of chocolate they shove at you afterwards…
Amy B @ Second City Randomness recently posted..#FirstWorldProblems

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54 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 6:51 pm

Yeahh can’t say foam cups are as cool Amy! But at least tasty hot cocoa was enjoyed :)

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55 Liz @ Southern Charm December 5, 2011 at 4:48 pm

YES! I have totally been in a poop mood lately! No idea why.

This weekend, I had my best friend’s baby shower and then a good guy friends birthday outing. It was a great time with friends!
Liz @ Southern Charm recently posted..Pecan Butter Cookies

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56 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 6:49 pm

That does sound like a lovely weekend Liz :)

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57 Kate @ Chasing It December 5, 2011 at 4:51 pm

21+ is a pretty darn good time for a 5k when your iron is low and you haven’t been training for racing!! so I say congrats! And I don’t think you need to feel like a hypocrite for racing – if it’s tradition and it’s your fave race, then of course I’d say go for it! And it was only 3.1 miles – now if you’d gone and run a half marathon that’d be a different story hahaha.

I feel ya on the blahs – and to be honest, no shame in not going out. Maybe I just went to a really nerdtastic college, but people at W&M would actually look down on you if you went out during finals – it meant you weren’t working hard enough lol!! I for one never really judged people that way (and 2nd semester senior year my biochem exam studies were mostly accompanied by a lovely ummm beer or three ahahha), but for most semesters, I had the time and energy to run, study, and eat. that was IT. lol. I’ve been feelin pretty blah lately myself…but I think that’s cuz I had to make the difficult decision to stop working out for an indefinite amount of time and obviously that makes me feel super awesome haha. Glad you had a good weekend with many victories!! :-D
Kate @ Chasing It recently posted..Injury Pain Isn’t Just Physical.

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58 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 6:47 pm

Thank you for the encouragement Kate! You are right, I should still be okay with that time with everything going on and such. I appreciate the reminder!
And yeah… if i was studying for a biochem exam I am pretty sure I would have had err 1-3 shots of something hard after lol (whoops did I just say that out loud ;) )
I am sorry about your poop head injury business girl :( You are doing so well with it though!

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59 Brittany @ GOtheXtraMile December 5, 2011 at 5:10 pm

you are absolutely not a hypocrite. I believe that running the race just because you wanted to, and it was your favorite, was a great decision. You can always go back to not running. One day shouldn’t ruin your outlook! I’m definitely feeling blah, finals will do tht to ya! I’m exited to just be done and get in the holiday spirit!!:)

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60 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 6:39 pm

Thank you Brittany, you are right one day is not going to change everything!

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61 Lauren December 5, 2011 at 5:42 pm

Yay for drinking the hot chocolate! I’m definitely one who used to love the feeling of “thinness” after I ran. I would go as long as I could every day without eating. And those who had a nutrition bar right after they ran… “They’re throwing away their fitness”.

Oy. What.Was.I.Thinking? Now look who had surgery on their knee twice… The girl who “wasn’t” throwing away her fitness. Oof.

I’m definitely in the blah mood and my workouts all weekend were what I could do within my bedroom in my apartment. Aka. Yoga, Pilates, Resistance Band, and 12-lb Dumbells. The voice in my head has not been a nice one all weekend.

Especially when my roommate and her boyfriend were downstairs making dinner. “They are totally going to judge me if I go down and eat. I’ll show them I can only eat Jello for this entire time.” Godddd, what is wrong with my mind?!

Like I said, I’m really glad you had the hot chocolate. After my half marathon, they gave out free beer and I wasn’t going to drink any… Except I saw the guy who was pacing me the entire race and he decided to strike a convo so I decided to have HALF a beer. ;-) I guess guys are okay for some reasons.

Good luck with the pizza! I’ve been trying to get myself to do that for a little while now. So far I’ve made it to diner pancakes (which are heavenly!)
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62 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 9:33 pm

There is nothing wrong with YOUR mind..it’s the eating disorder! I know those thoughts girl, but you just simply have to keep fighting them!

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63 Lena @Fit on the Rocks December 5, 2011 at 7:21 pm

I have been in major poop mood. Most likely because it hasn’t passed 25 degrees in like 5 days, and I want to turn into a hibernating bear lol. Good job on drinking the hot cocoa! I would have because it’s so freakin cold here. I was supposed to run a 5k on Saturday, but I bailed out on that and did my 9 mile run a day early.
Lena @Fit on the Rocks recently posted..PTO is the Spice of Life

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64 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 9:33 pm

Phew girl, 9 miles is impressive!

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65 Lizzy December 5, 2011 at 7:34 pm

Do not beat yourself up for running the race!!! you really wanted to, and it turned out amazingly!! I think running whenever you truly want to, will turn your mood around…maybe a little something inside of you is sad you are saying no running. Maybe whenever you get the urge to run you could just go for a little while freely without your watch or known distance. <–I love those type of runs! Congrats on your 5k, it was awesome! I hope your week is off to a great start! xoxo!
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66 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 9:32 pm

Thank you Lizzy :) And amazing job at your race!!

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67 Julia December 5, 2011 at 8:14 pm

Yours and Kiah’s blogs are my absolute favorites – such a cute picture of the both of you :)

I am glad you ran the hot chocolate AND had fun..don’t think you are a hypocrite AT ALL! The hot chocolate is MY favorite race as well (I have so much running it) so I wouldnt miss it for the world! I heard your race had quite some challenges though!! Were you as pissed off as everyone else I have heard about it? haha
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68 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 9:31 pm

That was actually the hot cocoa run that took place in DC… I heard it was utter chaos though!

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69 CJ @ http://healthy-happy-whole.com/ December 5, 2011 at 8:33 pm

im so proud of you for trying to the hot chocolate! what a great step! and so what you raced….next week maybe you will be happy with a walk or some other form of exercise. baby steps girl, baby steps. you are awesome!

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70 Chels December 5, 2011 at 9:08 pm

Good for you for taking the hot chocolate..I know how something so little can be something so huge in your mind. For me this weekend, I had a family get together and eating a muffin and pasta dish was difficult for me, but I was happy in the end when I did not restrict. I know how hard it is to take a rest day, but I can’t tell you how important it really is. For the past two months I have neglected my body and the warning signs. I am now stuck in overtraining mode. My eye is twitching and my muslces cramp up with even the slightest activity. I am drained emotionally and physically and my blood sugar levels are messed up. This is not the fisrt time I have done this. You would think by now I would have learned my lesson. So now I am leaving the gym behind and taking walks. I am having some anxiety with eating normal and not working out but I know my body needs the nutrients right now.
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71 tessa8m December 5, 2011 at 9:28 pm

That would have been hard for me too Chels, so I am very proud and inspired by you!
I am sorry you are noticing the over training :( But it sounds like you are doing what you need to to counteract the damage

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72 Rachel @ Eat, Learn, Discover! December 5, 2011 at 9:19 pm

even your sub-par runs are super fast! Now time for some rest :-)
I have never met another blogger, though I am hoping to very soon, as I know of a few girls that are coming to NYC within the next few weeks! I’m really excited, but I have no idea what it will be like. There is stuff I write on my blog that I have never talked to anyone about in person.
I had two awesome runs on the river this weekend, although one was at 7am on a sunday… not so great for a nocturnal!
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73 Rach December 5, 2011 at 9:37 pm

Haha! Nearly all my posts begin with an awkward “So…” as if I’m just picking up conversation where we last left off, haha! Sometimes I’ll go back and take out the so just so every single one of my posts don’t begin that way. ;)

Sooo… your 5k time kicks my PR in the tooshy, haha! So way to be speedy even when you aren’t your speediest! ;)
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74 Lyn @ FueledBySalad December 5, 2011 at 9:49 pm

I’m so proud of you for choosing what you truly wanted (aka the 5K!) over the gym – tune those nasty voices out and drink that hot chocolate. :) Great race, you are super speedy!
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75 StoriesAndSweetPotatoes December 5, 2011 at 10:28 pm

Don’t underestimate yourself for drinking that hot chocolate, no hypocrisy apologies needed! :)
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76 tessa8m December 6, 2011 at 7:12 am

Thank you Sara :)

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77 Cara @ EAT. PRAY. RUN. December 6, 2011 at 1:09 am

Great job on your decision with the 5k and enjoying that hot chocolate! You so deserve it and deserve to be as happy and joyful as you can possibly be. Keep up the good work :)
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78 Carolina @ Peas in a Blog December 6, 2011 at 8:05 am

I’ve read terrible reviews about this race but it doesn’t seem like you had any problems. Would you recommend it? I’m looking for a DC race to run next year.
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79 tessa8m December 6, 2011 at 10:50 am

Oh yes I heard about that race, but that is the one I ran in. Mine took place in Massachusetts

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80 Stephanie December 6, 2011 at 8:51 am

Good for you for drinking the chocolate! I’ve never met another blogger. I’d kind of like to someday, but – for some odd reason – rural eastern canada doesn’t seem to be a hotbed of bloggers! Ha! I’ve never run a race. I consider anytime I step on a treadmill to be a ginormous success…running and i aren’t exactly best friends.
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81 Living, Learning, Eating December 6, 2011 at 9:08 am

I’m glad you drank some – half is better than nothing! Maybe next year, you’ll manage the whole mug? :) Also, yay for not giving in on Saturday! You go, girl!

I’m going to try to read your posts (or if I miss them, catch up over the weekend) but I just wanted to let you know that I might not get around to any more blog reading until Friday. I’m not in Germany any more, as of 10pm last night I’m in London, and I’ve still got 3 days of travels ahead of me – yowza! – before I get home. Hopefully, exhaustion will not prevail. :P

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82 Rachel (tea and chocolate) December 6, 2011 at 9:29 am

Congrats on the race! And good for you for drinking the hot chocolate. :)
I had a meet-up with a few other St. Louis bloggers over the summer. It’s so nice to be able to talk to people with similar interests since none of my friends are interested in nutrition/healthy living. Thank goodness for this community, right?
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83 tessa8m December 6, 2011 at 10:48 am

Hi Rachel! Thank goodness indeed :) That sounds like a fun event!

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84 Kat December 6, 2011 at 10:45 am

I actually did a whole lot of NOTHING this weekend!! My shoulder was really bothering me so I just took it easy. I did some kickboxing and tried yoga but could only manage 20 minutes with my shoulder. O well!
Congrats on the race, and IFNALLY drinking the hot cocoa. I bet it tasted so much better than usual :)

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85 tessa8m December 6, 2011 at 7:52 pm

Aww I am sorry you shoulder was bothering you! I hope it is better know of course

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86 Jessica @ Sushi and Sit-Ups December 6, 2011 at 11:40 am

So glad you were able to meet up with the other blogger and swap stories. Can’t wait to hear how the pizza session goes. Congrats on running the race and finishing in a great time even though you didn’t want to. And congrats on drinking the hot chocolate–you earned it!
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87 Sarah@The Flying ONION December 6, 2011 at 12:18 pm

Ugh, I can’t believe I missed such a fun race! I had been planning on going but somehow the time just escaped me and I completely forgot about it. NEXT year! :D

And so glad you were able to savor and enjoy the hot chocolate this year! :D
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88 tessa8m December 6, 2011 at 7:57 pm

Next year for sure! I don’t know where I will be living at this time next year, but I will find my way back for the event :)

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89 Jemma @ Celery and Cupcakes December 6, 2011 at 3:22 pm

A big congrats on such an amazing race! :D
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90 Corrie Anne December 6, 2011 at 3:56 pm

I like how you bribed yourself not to go to the gym by taking away the race. Way to rest & drink the hot chocolate. I’m feeling pretty good even after the weekend except that it is SO COLD. I missed out on an Ugly Sweater 5k and I wasn’t to disappointed about it after the fact because the weather was so lousy. Looking forward to taking a new “sports training” class at the gym tonight with my husband. We love the classes that we can take together since most are girly-focused!
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91 tessa8m December 6, 2011 at 8:02 pm

There are so many classes that geared toward women… I hope you have a great time with the husband!

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92 tea-bagginit December 6, 2011 at 5:37 pm

i think you should let yourself off the hook for not wanting to go out on the weekends. everyone is different and some people prefer social environments more while others prefer more calm introversion. none is right and none is wrong. they’re both just us!
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93 tessa8m December 6, 2011 at 8:08 pm

That is true girl… I am conflicted about this sometimes but you are right

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94 Sonia (the Mexigarian) December 6, 2011 at 6:37 pm

The race sounds like fun. Actually, I’ve been a doom and gloom mood as well and it’s hard to shake. I’ve been feeling fatigued and I know it’s because I am not eating enough on the weekdays and binging on the weekend which, in my mind, I must make up for on the weekdays, which goes hand in hand with the mood. Viscous cycle.

The one good thing this past weekend was that my little sister came down from North North Cal. got to see her. Hubby and I had a date night on Saturday and went to the Festival of Lights in Vasona Park in Los Gatos and we also met with our realtor to discuss when we can start looking for a house. Stress!!

And nope. I haven’t met up with another blogger or blog reader. Would like to though. I think it’d be fun.
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95 Chelsea @ The Nut Butter Runner December 6, 2011 at 8:19 pm

Congrats on the race! Don’t beat yoself up on running it. Just be happy that you drank some delishy-lish hot chocolate and was able to enjoy yourself! :)
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96 Alexa @ SimpleEats December 6, 2011 at 10:23 pm

Congrats on getting over that hurdle of drinking hot chocolate, that’s definitely a mental accomplishment! I’m the Boston area, I’d love to meet up! :)
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97 Isabelle December 6, 2011 at 11:25 pm

You did a fantastic time considering you’ve been taking time off from running and the fatigue you’ve been experiencing. Glad you had some Hot Chocolate!

It’s hard actually taking a rest day. But not actively resting will soon catch up with you…I’m a prime example of this! Good on you for not doing anything the day before. I have to constantly talk myself into not working out after a run, before I go out and even the day before a race.

Difficult decision for me: Still currently making it. This coming Friday I have a friends b’day dinner party. Friday is supposed to be my rest day but knowing I will be consuming a lot more then usual through drinks and cake…I want to work out.
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98 Kris | iheartwellness.com December 7, 2011 at 3:01 am

You’re AMAZING, girl and you inspire me every day that I read your posts and the comments you leave for me ;) Love you!!

The last difficult decision I made was 7 months ago to use our rent money {when we HAD NO MONEY!} to start up our business…..we knew to do it, but I was scuuuurrdd, and it all worked out better than imagined!!

xxoo

Keep Rocking it!
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99 Nettie Lawson December 9, 2011 at 6:21 pm

And I checked out those Game of Thrones books…totally think I’m gonna have to start reading them! So worth it. I had a meet-up with a few other St. Ive haven’t done that race yet but would like to some time.
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100 tessa8m December 10, 2011 at 1:56 pm

I am glad you bought them! I am sure you will enjoy them, well I hope of course :)

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101 Rosie Slater February 20, 2012 at 12:55 am

Maybe next year, you’ll manage the whole mug? I felt kind of blah and meh like you did for the last few weeks, but this last week has gotten better.
Rosie Slater recently posted..Many Mops

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